Why Do Girls Give Blowjobs
The women who responded had a variety of reasons for their love of giving head. On a psychological level, some said they enjoyed the power of having their partner at their mercy, and being able to control their pleasure with the slightest tongue flick. On a physical level, others said they liked the taste and the feeling of a smooth penis in their mouth. And then there's the emotional side to blowjobs: a number of respondents said they use oral sex to show their partner how much they love and appreciate them.
why do girls give blowjobs
"I always enjoyed the feeling of giving pleasure to my partner with oral, but only in the past few years did that grow into more of a serious kink. I only really watch blowjob porn. If I am thinking about sex, it is about blowjobs. If I am having sex, (not always but most of the time,) I am thinking about giving him head. It is pretty much my number one desire in the bedroom now. I love deep-throating the most and all the other frills that go with it. But light teasing sessions are also really great, the slow build up for both of us is very exciting. I have absolutely no idea why I like it so much, I just do, but I have never had any complaints so never really worried." [via]
"I've always hated blowjobs and refused to do it. The most recent guy I'm with has an amazing dick. Its so beautiful and looking at it makes my mouth water. I love how it feels in my mouth, how he swears when my mouth goes on him. He smiles so happily and it makes me happy for making him happy." [via]
A lot of women do not want to give their partners a blowjob. Their reason should not be an issue for anyone. Their bodies are their own and their decision should be respected by any man who wants to be with them.
No matter which way you look at it, a woman should be given the right to control what happens to her body. If they do not want to give a guy a blowjob, it should be their prerogative. They should not be made to feel bad about not doing it, which is something that a lot of men do these days.
A man who approaches the concept of a blowjob by forcing her into it does not deserve to be with any woman. You should always ask a girl if she wants to give you a blowjob. If you think that words are not necessary, think again.
When a woman refuses to give you a blow job, accept the situation. If it bothers you so much, then discuss it with your partner. It is not a hopeless situation, because there are a lot of reasons why women do not want to give blowjobs, as we mentioned earlier.
If you try to understand the reasons why a girl refuses to give a blowjob, you will be able to sympathize with her. There is nothing a woman likes more than an understanding and considerate man.
The answers vary, as human opinions tend to do. A survey conducted by sex coach and educator Sean Jameson revealed that while 92.6% of women like to give blow jobs, 76.8% have had at least one experience giving a blowjob they did not enjoy.
"I used to hate giving blowjobs. It was all in the title "job," but once I met my (now) husband I couldn't give him enough! It's like my body reacted in such a way, and I got super turned on! And of course hubby didn't mind. He loved the way I would twist my head as I worked my magic (although he was a virgin and couldn't compare to past experiences)."
"I thoroughly enjoy it, actually. I can't stand when I read and/or hear that women don't like to give blowjobs. Speak for yourself. I get soooo turned on by getting my guy off. I bring my A-game, too. Of course, my man does the same in return."
"I'll pass on a bj but they aren't too bad if you don't have to swallow. They are kind of annoying and could be time-consuming. I do avoid them since I've been married. If you give them often then your partner might always expect them or they could be a gateway to actual sex."
"I used to like them. Now my neck hurts, my arm goes numb, my hand cramps up. I'm getting too old. If you ask my husband, he feels like he was sold a shoddy deal. He was so used to getting them, and I loved giving them to him. And now, not so much. But my technique is still impeccable and I don't want to give him just a crappy one. If it's not the best then why do it at all. My husband probably won't agree with that."
Whether you love it or hate it, you almost definitely have an opinion about oral sex, especially when it comes to performing oral sex. Sometimes you're into it, sometimes you're not, sometimes it's all about just focusing on trying not to gag if your partner has a penis, and sometimes you just give oral just so you can get some oral of your own in return. Like any other sex act out there, how women feel about giving blow jobs or cunnilingus can often depend on mood.
However, when I was in college, I used to give blow jobs to pretty much every guy I had sex with, largely because I felt like it was expected of me and not a 'big deal' compared to having sex. And I am very, very, VERY wary of this kind of thinking now.
Caitlin, 28, loves the joy oral sex brings. "I actually really enjoy giving blow jobs. There's a power in your sexuality when you give head, and it can be really fun if you embrace it. And if I'm with a good partner, it makes me happy that I'm giving them so much enjoyment. I'm in a long-term committed relationship and we both love giving and receiving, and pretty much start off that way before we have sex every time."
As is the case with any sexual act, you're under no obligation to give your partner oral sex. But if you love it, then go for it. If it's not your cup of tea, then it's not your cup tea, so take it off the menu. Boundaries exist for a reason.
If you can deep throat without issue, go for it. It's an awesome skill that you unfortunately can't list on your résumé, so use it when you can. But you can also give a stellar blow job without the head of a penis provoking your gag reflex.
If he's right on the brink of orgasm and you call a time out, yes, you'll probably have to put in some extra work to get him back to the point of no return. But if you feel like your jaw's seizing up, give it a rest. You can use your hands to keep the good feelings going.
I currently have a man in my life who I'm not exactly dating, but who comes over about once a week to eat me out. The only thing I give him in return is a pat on the back for doing a good job. Some might think this arrangement is strange, but I prefer to think of it as pretty damn close to perfect. It was on our second date that I first gave him the opportunity to suck on my clitoris. After thanking him for giving me a ride home, I simply said, "Want to come up to my place and eat me out?" He gave me an enthusiastic yes, and we got to it. I sat on his face until I came, then sent him home. This has been our arrangement for a little over two months now. If you're wondering why we don't have sex, it's because I have made a promise to myself not to have sex until I'm in a relationship. While this guy is obviously very generous, the chemistry is not really there when it comes to the little things, like conversation.
The real root of the problem seems to be that too many straight dudes are under the impression that women orgasm from penetration. The only thing a man has been able to give me during penetrative sex is HPV. I have never been able to come from penetration alone, and I am in the majority: Between 50 to 75 percent of women need clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm. A small portion of women are fortunate to have their clitoris positioned close enough to their vagina that they can come from just sex. Sadly, while my clitoris is in the same region as my vagina, it is still too distant for me to not need oral sex. Think of my clitoris as Alaska, while my vagina is Russia. (If you need a less cold or oppressive analogy, replace Alaska with South Korea and Russia with North Korea.)
I'm fully aware that there is such a thing as stimulating myself while being fucked. However, I've never been able to actually make this work. For me to reach an orgasm, I need to concentrate. I have to give my clitoris my full attention if it's going to give me the result I want. This level of concentration is hard to obtain while a guy is bouncing in and out of me, rhetorically asking me if I "like that."
Look, I know that my years of being denied oral sex is my fault too. I was a different person then. I never asked for what I wanted, because I worried it would make me seem less attractive. It's something a lot of women feel, that it's more important to fulfill a man's desires over our own. You know, in order to "keep him." Even the most headstrong, self-reliant, progressive women fall victim to this line of thinking. I have finally been able to fully shed myself of my meekness when it comes to sex and I know now that I can not only demand what I want but also deny what I don't want: blowjobs.
A go-to position for many, this one offers a good angle for the giver, plus lots of access to the rest of the receiver's body--like grabbing breasts or their butt. To turn up the heat, throw out a "sit on my face" when you initially start hooking up, or whenever you want to change positions. (Here's our dirty talk guide for more inspo.)
Giving head on your knees might seem like something more traditionally associated with blowjobs, but it can be hot for pretty much anyone. Remember to spread the labia here for more clitoral exposure.
According to Engle, it's important to make sure your partner knows how much you want to give oral sex. Some people don't enjoy oral because they can't get out of their head, when a little reassurance is all they might need. "Making them feel comfortable and sexy in their body will help them relax. A relaxed woman is one more likely to experience an orgasm!"
Using both your hands and mouth together instead is essential on our list of how to give a good blow job. While technically blow jobs only require you to use your mouth, it helps a great amount if you are mixing it up with a hand job as well. It also takes some pressure off, trust us!